“No one develops in isolation.” This phrase is one tossed around family science programs all the time, but what does it really mean? To me, it means that there are hundreds of different factors that make up a person. No individual is defined by simply existing. As family science professionals, we know there is so much more. The National Council on Family Relations notes that human growth and development includes “physical, emotional, cognitive, social, moral, and personality aspects” (ncfr.org). In other words, it takes a village.
Each of our lives deserves to be treated as an undeserved gift. We are each unique because we come from unique backgrounds and situations. There are no two people on earth who have led identical lives; this is why there have been studies done on identical twins who followed polar opposite trajectories with polar opposite results. Our growth and development is shaped by every interaction we have, every decision we make, and even some we don’t make for ourselves. There are some factors which have stronger influences than others: our parents, the way we are disciplined, the socioeconomic environment we are raised in. This is the nature of life: We live it, and none of us lives it the same way.
Indeed, we are all unique. But we have one thing in common: We never stop growing. Without growth, we die. Not only in the physical sense, but in every other human area, we have to keep moving forward. The study of human growth and development gives us an insight into what makes people who they are as they sit or stand in front of us at any given moment. It is quite amazing that one day, based on our circumstances and experiences, we can wake up and be completely new and different and changed from the previous day. This is why understanding the processes that make us who we are is so crucial. Without knowing each others’ stories, we will never truly know each other.
Each of our lives deserves to be treated as an undeserved gift. We are each unique because we come from unique backgrounds and situations. There are no two people on earth who have led identical lives; this is why there have been studies done on identical twins who followed polar opposite trajectories with polar opposite results. Our growth and development is shaped by every interaction we have, every decision we make, and even some we don’t make for ourselves. There are some factors which have stronger influences than others: our parents, the way we are disciplined, the socioeconomic environment we are raised in. This is the nature of life: We live it, and none of us lives it the same way.
Indeed, we are all unique. But we have one thing in common: We never stop growing. Without growth, we die. Not only in the physical sense, but in every other human area, we have to keep moving forward. The study of human growth and development gives us an insight into what makes people who they are as they sit or stand in front of us at any given moment. It is quite amazing that one day, based on our circumstances and experiences, we can wake up and be completely new and different and changed from the previous day. This is why understanding the processes that make us who we are is so crucial. Without knowing each others’ stories, we will never truly know each other.
Academic Preparation
- Introduction to Human Development
- Early Childhood Development
- Middle Childhood and Adolescence
- Human Development and Aging
Work/Volunteer Experience
Recruitment Guide
I worked for two summers in a row as a recruitment guide for women coming through the Greek recruitment process. It was a two-week commitment in which I was essentially the girls’ camp counselor, helping them make difficult decisions and cope with stressful situations. During this time, I was reminded of the ways adolescents tend to make decisions. I put myself in their shoes and remembered what it was like to be in that stage of development, to have to operate as an independent person capable of carrying out adult-like responsibilities.
Women’s Point Leader
I have been leading the women’s side of a house church that is part of Ichthus Manhattan for the last two years. I am in charge of making sure women are being mentored and shepherded appropriately. It is fascinating to see the ways that peoples’ stories have brought them through certain doors to where they now stand. Knowing and understanding peoples’ spiritual development/background is just as important as knowing the tangible events that have transpired in their lives.
I worked for two summers in a row as a recruitment guide for women coming through the Greek recruitment process. It was a two-week commitment in which I was essentially the girls’ camp counselor, helping them make difficult decisions and cope with stressful situations. During this time, I was reminded of the ways adolescents tend to make decisions. I put myself in their shoes and remembered what it was like to be in that stage of development, to have to operate as an independent person capable of carrying out adult-like responsibilities.
Women’s Point Leader
I have been leading the women’s side of a house church that is part of Ichthus Manhattan for the last two years. I am in charge of making sure women are being mentored and shepherded appropriately. It is fascinating to see the ways that peoples’ stories have brought them through certain doors to where they now stand. Knowing and understanding peoples’ spiritual development/background is just as important as knowing the tangible events that have transpired in their lives.
Reflection
As someone whose passions lie in knowing people deeply, I have always been interested in understanding the way we grow and develop. One of my greatest strengths is that of empathy; even when I don’t understand someone, I have always had this basic understanding that sometimes events in peoples’ lives are out of their control, and they often react rather than respond. However, once I began to study human development in my course work at Kansas State, I realized how much greater the scope of influences most people are under is than I ever could have imagined. Things that some people may consider minor events were the things that molded others into who they are today.
To give a personal example, I would like to share a piece of my story. My parents were married for 22 years before they filed for divorce in September of 2009. This “solid foundation” that I believed my life to have been built on was shattered in an instant. This event drove me into a deep depression for the majority of my high school career. I felt misunderstood, often invisible to those around me. I found great help in a counselor, who I later discovered graduated with a Family Studies and Human Services degree from Kansas State. It was because of her that I chose to attend K-State and pursue the same degree. Had I not gone through the painful experience of my parents’ separation and divorce and finally agreed to let this counselor help me through it all, I would have never ended up in Manhattan, Kansas with this great throbbing heart for people that I have now. On top of that, I have the education to go along with my passion.
Beyond this period in my life, my experience leading other people in their faith has taught me so much about human development. I hear many people’s stories of growing up and developing in their unique family contexts. When you initially meet people, it may not always be clear that their family affects them, because you do not get to see them in that context. However, once I dove deeper with people, it became clear that they are profoundly impacted by their family of origin. It is also fascinating to see where people have come from and how they are growing. Sometimes growth is apparent month-to-month. That is one of the most encouraging parts of mentoring and leading others.
Obviously, I have decades of growth to undergo, but that’s what excites me. Something I would like to understand more deeply is how our early development affects our abilities to set boundaries with people in our lives. For example, how does the way we were disciplined by our parents affect our ability to say “no” to certain people or demands? I have realized lately that I struggle to set healthy boundaries with others, and I often overcommit to things in my personal life. I am learning that because of this, I easily burn out. This area is one I would like to grow in knowledge of as well as personally develop in.
I also want to understand more about the complex physical development we each other go, including the psychological and neurological aspects of our mental and biological development. I was in an honors psychology course my freshman year, and found it fascinating to learn about the ways our brains are shaped and molded and the ways our environment affects our psychological wellbeing. I have a basic understanding of these concepts, but I know there is so much more that I would like to understand.
This is just one example of the ways our life course shapes us. It presents us with different paths to choose from, different decisions to make. This is what I love about human development: it never ceases. We may endure traumas, adversity, challenge after challenge, but there is nothing stopping us from filling our lives with new perspectives and experiences that can transform and change us and heal us and refine us.
To give a personal example, I would like to share a piece of my story. My parents were married for 22 years before they filed for divorce in September of 2009. This “solid foundation” that I believed my life to have been built on was shattered in an instant. This event drove me into a deep depression for the majority of my high school career. I felt misunderstood, often invisible to those around me. I found great help in a counselor, who I later discovered graduated with a Family Studies and Human Services degree from Kansas State. It was because of her that I chose to attend K-State and pursue the same degree. Had I not gone through the painful experience of my parents’ separation and divorce and finally agreed to let this counselor help me through it all, I would have never ended up in Manhattan, Kansas with this great throbbing heart for people that I have now. On top of that, I have the education to go along with my passion.
Beyond this period in my life, my experience leading other people in their faith has taught me so much about human development. I hear many people’s stories of growing up and developing in their unique family contexts. When you initially meet people, it may not always be clear that their family affects them, because you do not get to see them in that context. However, once I dove deeper with people, it became clear that they are profoundly impacted by their family of origin. It is also fascinating to see where people have come from and how they are growing. Sometimes growth is apparent month-to-month. That is one of the most encouraging parts of mentoring and leading others.
Obviously, I have decades of growth to undergo, but that’s what excites me. Something I would like to understand more deeply is how our early development affects our abilities to set boundaries with people in our lives. For example, how does the way we were disciplined by our parents affect our ability to say “no” to certain people or demands? I have realized lately that I struggle to set healthy boundaries with others, and I often overcommit to things in my personal life. I am learning that because of this, I easily burn out. This area is one I would like to grow in knowledge of as well as personally develop in.
I also want to understand more about the complex physical development we each other go, including the psychological and neurological aspects of our mental and biological development. I was in an honors psychology course my freshman year, and found it fascinating to learn about the ways our brains are shaped and molded and the ways our environment affects our psychological wellbeing. I have a basic understanding of these concepts, but I know there is so much more that I would like to understand.
This is just one example of the ways our life course shapes us. It presents us with different paths to choose from, different decisions to make. This is what I love about human development: it never ceases. We may endure traumas, adversity, challenge after challenge, but there is nothing stopping us from filling our lives with new perspectives and experiences that can transform and change us and heal us and refine us.